Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Hello, people! This is Millie from ClassicForever pretending to be Kate for the day!

Anyway.

The title of this post is terribly misleading.

I have no real beauty tips for you. But, I am incredibly lazy.

Mainly, I was wondering if there are any other people like me out there?

For instance, today -- as with every other day -- I set my alarm for 45 minutes before I had to leave. I then snoozed the alarm several times and finally jumped up 15 minutes later. I proceeded to take a 20 minute shower. Then I used my other ten minutes to dress, apply make-up, and get all the food I'm going to need for the long day ahead (3 hours of classes and five hours of English [yes. hilarious, isn't it?] tutoring at my college).

Dressing is usually accomplished by choosing an array of clothes off the floor (clean clothes on a clean floor!). Today, I am quite afraid that I am wearing blue-green floral leggings, a brown and white spotted dress, a grey sweater, blue TOMS, and of course my Survivor buff. It's Survivor Wednesday -- and I need my team to win.

I do realize that at this point you are wondering why Kate, the famously gorgeous/awesome style icon (and strange hater of awesome reality TV competitions), has anything to do with me -- much less would ask me to write a guest post on her blog!

It's simple. I've known her for quite awhile. And I know her secrets. (Example: She obsessively LOVES Tyrone Power [even has a special room/shrine devoted to him]. Don't let her know I told you that though. No need to even mention it when she gets back! BELIEVE ME!)

^She has a full wall mural of this.

Yeah. Anyway. Back to laziness.

My make-up application consists of eyeliner pencil and mascara. It's not that I dislike cool make-up or anything, it's just that I'm crippled by my overwhelming love for sleep, long showers, and food. When I have a limited amount of time, I'm always gonna choose food.

And then comes the hair. This actually is a lazy person beauty tip.

I used to have the most terrible problems with my hair. It's impossibly straight and refuses to be worked with. Combine that with my extreme laziness, which barely included brushing my hair (and DEFINITELY did not include things like hair-dryers and special product), and you had a sad state of affairs.

Thankfully, Carey Mulligan started cutting her hair. And, because I copy all of Carey Mulligan's haircuts (I literally cannot help myself), I began to cut my hair. Currently, it is in a delightful pixie. AND THE LAZY PERSON INSIDE OF ME REJOICES CONSTANTLY.

^Note: this is not a photo of me.

I don't even have to brush it most of the time.

I just shampoo it and let it air-dry on my way to college. By the time I get to school, it's usually mostly dry and I put in a little bit of finishing paste using my rear-view mirror -- AND IT'S ALL GOOD.

So, really, that is an actual beauty tip: cut all your hair off. You won't regret it.

Now, I don't what else to say. It's kinda terrible, but I'm too lazy to come up with any other fake beauty tips (this post is now more than slightly pathetic).

This is actually why Kate asked me to guest blog. Because, by the time I finished here -- you will all have a new appreciation for the pink-haired goddess.

So with that in mind, I want to thank you all for reading this post and I hope -- HOPE -- that there are other lazy people out there. If not, I will be forced to shuffle back to the shadowy, lonesome corner whence I came.

Thank you.

-Millie

P.S. Remember, there is NO need to tell Kate about the Ty thing. It will only embarrass her!

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